Feelin the Fernweh

Our spiffy new Dauin National High School Library is complete and finally in action! This library room was originally used as the principal’s office, then for the next 5 years, the door was always kept locked and used for yucky rat eaten books storage, secret student canoodling, and played home to 13 half full coca cola liters. My counterpart, Ma’am Cathy, and I decided to work on the renovation over the end of summer, and as our reward, negotiated it into being our new office for this year. The principal thought it was a splendid idea and designated Cathy as the official librarian. It took probably a little under 2 months of consistent work. The most strenuous of course was shifting all of the thousand of books repeatedly to various corners of the room as the floor was being tiled. The library is in a weird area up some stairs and alone with not much space at all outside the door. I slept like a baby but walked around like a lola during the days of soreness that followed…We got the floor tiled and walls freshly painted using the M.O.O.E. (Maintenance and Other Operating Expenses) monthly Dep Ed fund. We had a few student helpers, but it was really us two doing most of the sweaty summer manual labor, due to the time crunch. We deemed more than one thousand books to be condemnable. Dun dun dunnn… These were not readable anymore, missing pages and covers, inaccurate information, or just plain smelly, old, and gross. Someone took them all somewhere… hopefully they can be reborn. As sad as it was to get rid of any books, we still had around 2000 to keep and organize, a quite laborious process. As much work as it was, it was really fun to look at each and every book; there definitely were some amusing ones. We then put them into labeled genres to make it easier for the students to find what they are looking for.

All of the bags of trash from the old "library"

Books books books!

Final Product!

FULL House!

 After rearranging all of the books, trophies, and other relics, then rearranging again, thanks to Cathy’s perfectionist eyes, we opened up the first week of school. The students were so excited! Now the library has a constant flow of students who want to do research, or just a calm/mostly quiet place to hang out and read. I eat lunch in the library, and almost every seat is full daily at lunchtime. Kids even come over from the elementary school next door for a change of scenery and to get their hands on a book. These thousands of books were just anxiously hibernating in the dark, waiting to be read by students for so many years. Most books have been donated by various organizations and people, but now is the first time they are actually being put to use! It really is tangible proof that all of our hard work paid off, and the students really appreciate and use the library. I purchased a whiteboard, so we are also using it as our classroom for the few 4^th year classes that were in falling apart and very distracting rooms. I also finally got to make an order at the curious little rubber stamp maker stand man in the city. So, now we have begun the process of stamping all of our books with “DNHS Library,” and students have started checking out books with their “Borrower’s Cards” that we created. Hopefully we can now get our pre-planned remedial reading program up and running, since we have a venue and the resources now. All that is lacking is teacher motivation and consensus for the program…wish us luck! I was instructed by Lynn to email the education sector manager the new library info, which actually was the paragraphs above copy and pasted...next thing I know, she forwards it to all Philippines PCVs as a "great example of making due with what exists, hard work, and collaboration with counterpart." Peace corps....so annoyingly sneaky.

Bulletin Board

Student-Made Bookmarks

Next…It turned out to be one of the best birthdays ever. I did not tell anyone from school that it was my birthday except for Ma’am Cathy, who swears she did not tell anyone…a likely story. So, I go to school expecting a tedious day like every other. My first class was scheduled in our new library, but when the students were 15 minutes late, I angrily stomped over to their homeroom class with my lesson plan and papers… just to stumble upon everyone standing to sing happy birthday. They had made a homemade delicious cake (turned into a frosting fight later). A few of the students from this class are in glee club, and they performed a few songs and choreographed dances of course. One of my teacher pets, Raymart, sang “High” by The Speaks, it was the first thing to make me cry that day. I had heard the song before, did not know it was a Filipino band, YOUTUBE IT! Not to mention a few students who made me special cards, posters, and sweet speeches. Two girls wrote their own song… making me cry again, the lyrics were so nice and talked about how I never give up on them, am still kind when they are annoying, and that I will be in their hearts and a part of their future success forever. This was the star section, so their English is fairly impressive. I definitely have now come to the point where I have cried more in the Philippines…due to both happiness and sadness…than I have ever cried before in my whole life. Is that a good thing? Who knows… might just be a sign of my impeding insanity and bipolarness. The whole thing wrapped up with another student who made an entire slideshow of stolen Facebook pictures of my life since high school…yes, including that embarrassing dinosaur onesie shot. The party turned into an epic photo shoot like most Filipino events, then morphed into an icing cake fight. Fun stuff. The day continued with an unexpected lovely teacher prepared feast of a surprise lunch with my favorite hard to find mangosteen fruits. Countless flowers, cards, and gifts, more serenading, not to mention a red carpet spread out with rose petals from section Opal... Ay yai yai! I was completely blown away. I don’t know if I have ever felt so special.

Dun Dunnn Dun Dun

Cuties

Rex from We're Back, "LUUUNCH"

Then to follow all of that all with a spectacular day of Apo Island scuba diving with my brother, Chris, Hillary, Michelle, and Harold (who surprised me yet again with another personalized cake on the boat and then BBQ dinner with my favorite fish ceviche, kinilaw, and videoke for my friends) Just what I needed. So many unnecessary and over the top gestures of kindness… with the only motive of making me feel appreciated, special, and loved. Chada kaayo diri!  We saw a number of turtles, giant school of jackfish, Betelgeuse lookin sea snakes, and we even did a drift dive were we just went with the current, so cool! Best 2 days of birthday ever, meant so much to me. Combining all of that with just having had my heart broken 3 weeks earlier and broken again a few days before by something he did, reminding me of my insignificance to him, and then not hearing anything at all from him on my birthday, I was definitely an emotional wreck. I am sure you are dying to know the story, but I don’t want to spread all of the intense chika chika, so I will instead sum it all up to one word… incompatibility. We see the world through extremely different eyes, which at first was invigorating, but got more and more infuriating, driving us both mad. Also importantly, we do not value honesty in a relationship the same way, dooming us from the start. It was a wonderful time while it lasted for almost a year, and we will try to stay friends, but sadly, I have lost the respect I used to have for him. That is not bitterness talk, it is just me finally using my brain instead of my heart.

Crabby patty?

Surprise Cake # 3 

Neon Urchin in Dauin

Me and Matt

I spy a turtle!

Moving on… Have you ever been homesick for a place you have never been? This feeling of fernweh, or so it’s called by those loony Germans, is what led me to Peace Corps in the first place, and after having my family visit, The Philippines really feels like a new home now and the fernweh is creepin up once again, I am wanting to travel someplace new. My friends are trying to plan a camping trip with the orangutans in Indonesia this summer, BUT for the first time in my life, I might be ready to head back to the U.S. after Peace Corps and stick around for a while. Now at age 24, after visiting 20 countries and being blessed to have more once in a lifetime experiences under my belt than most people (traveling, skydiving in Hawaii, working at a TV station and bungee jumping in New Zealand, building a school in Costa Rica, sleeping on the Great Wall of China, flying a plane in Namibia, snowboarding, surfing, scuba diving, and so much more) I am ready to simmer down a bit and take it easy…but then again, I have another year left here, so ask me my feelings next year! I do know that I am missing my family and friends immensely right now. I wonder sometimes why I left them all, along with an awesome career start in international education, but then I step out my door, gaze at the ocean and chat with my adorable and starry eyed students, and I have no doubt that I am meant to be here right now, and that this is what was missing. I now have two new loving Filipino families, a circle of awesome volunteer friends, and I have learned so much more about our world and myself.

Nipa Family Time

 Matt is back in the U.S. and now is the time to really focus on work. A few of us girls on our Negros Island have planned a GLOW camp for next month. GLOW stands for Girls Leading Our World, and I could not be more excited for this, it was actually the one thing I was sure of doing before I even got to the Philippines. Female empowerment is seriously lacking in the Philippines with obstructing gender stereotyping very prevalent. The camp will touch on other issues also like leadership, healthy relationships, body image, self-esteem, and sex education. It will be held August 8 to 11^th for 60 girls from Hillary’s high school up north, all third and fourth year.. so 14-16 years old. There hasn't been anything like this at our schools and the idea of empowerment for young girls in the Philippines is fairly new. Girls here in most rural areas are expected to marry early, stay at home, and take care of their abusive and alcoholic husbands. Big generalization, I know, but we are definitely behind here with gender equality. Anything to do with sex is so taboo here, that the amount and bizarreness of misinformation is absurd. Combine that with the Catholic Church straight up telling kids if they use condoms they will get cancer (yes I actually witnessed this first hand and in shock during a monthly school mass…) No wonder this country has an overpopulation problem. This is our guinea pig school since the principal is pretty liberal, then we hope to hold the same camp at each of our high schools. 

Matt and his LCP boys

We Found Baby Bunnies at LCP

Double Trouble

I am just getting over a very low of my emotional rollercoaster… and I am sick of seeing so many heartbreaking scenes. The other night, a couple of puppies ran through my open door whining and looking for food, one clearly with a giant bloated belly full of worms and close to death. Then having them freak out with tail-wagging excitement after I cuddled them a bit because all they have ever known of human affection in their short lives is a kick or “che che.” Just as I was enjoying their company, Lola comes in with a metal rod to bang them away. Another whirlwind of emotions after the next. I hear whimpers and cries from kittens and puppies on a regular basis, who have been dumped in my open backyard to be left for dead. It really kills me and has widened my soft spot for animals even more. Even if I am not the biggest fan of cats… to see or hear such innocent things suffer and not be able to do anything about it because it will happen again the next day…really miserable. This also reminded me of Palawan, where we saw a half paralyzed dog, who had obviously gotten so from being hit by a car, trying to scoot itself to cover and out of the pouring rain. Also, at Matt’s volunteer organization, seeing the most adorable and sweetest kids ever who continue to put others first when they have come from abusive and dysfunctional families. I try to never take for granted how lucky and fortunate I have been in this life, but it is impossible not to feel guilty when I have the option to go back into a life of opportunity, privilege, and freedom, and I eventually will.

Sitting down to dinner one day, Matt being particularly stressed and testy due to the many frustrations of living and working in a different culture, the girls were playing rather loudly with a big ball next to the table. Matt asks Mariz to play and grabs the ball… only to through it out the door in a fit of anger… leading to Mariz having a tantrum of tears. I felt like I was watching a funny movie. She got over it of course. Matt and I had so many good times…We watched a weird Filipino fashion show on the beach in Dauin, met a drunken lesbian New York cop at one of the resorts, who was very entertaining. She told the Filipino innocent bartender that if he put on a pink grass skirt, she would be interested. She also told us that her scuba group saw a whale shark on a dive in Dauin yesterday. Jealoussss. We went scuba diving and adventuring. We watched countless TV episodes that I am too embarrassed to mention here. We are in our own world most of the time, and it was so nice to have him in my wacky world here with me for a bit. It just so happened, it was when I needed him and a voice of reason the most. I hit the mark a few weeks ago…HOORAY for 1 indescribable YEAR so far in the Philippines!!!    

LCP Soup Kitchen, Claytown Daro

Soup Kitchen Kiddos and the lovely Flor

Baby Shark! Can't go wrong...

Dishin out da MONGOS

So well behaved.... when eating...

My Favorite Boy in the WORLD

The Greenpeace boat, Esperanza, ported in Dumaguete this weekend and opened its doors to visitors. It was an insanely crowded event; the only other Philippines city they are stopping in is Manila, before moving on to Thailand. The coolest thing though is that they came here mainly for Apo Island, my next-door neighbor! The came to take footage of the other side of the island that has been completely destroyed by Typhoon Sendong a few years ago. The other side of the island is flourishing. Harold showed them all around Apo, then we planned a big get together night out for all of the Greenpeace peeps, peace corps peeps, and aussie volunteers. Way too many crazy hippies for one area. Chris, Dave, and I later on took our hippy selves to Harold’s Eco lodge up in the mountains of Valencia. The next day, we walked up and up to where there was rumored to be some cool waterfall. The walk was so amazing itself, pitcher plants, the sensitive plant, countless types of gorgeous flowers, and the best part was having botanist Dave with us to identify everything and tell us all the cool facts! We were told there were almost 400 stairs/rocks to get down to the waterfall, boy they were not kidding. 4 days later, I still feel like an achy granny lola. It was so worth it though! After hiking for a couple of hours, essentially bouldering on our hands and feet crossing all of these raging river rocks, just around a random corner we see it. AN OVER 90 FOOT WATERFALL!!!  It was so spectacular and majestic! These surprise little slices of heaven-like experiences make me so thankful to be alive and here in the Philippines with some of the coolest and most genuine people I have ever known... makes my darkest and loneliest moments feel miniscule in the grand scheme of things.

Unemployable Liberals.

Once Matt left, my old roommate popped up again...

Botanist Buddy Dave with Casaroro Falls

Now that my best friend and brother is gone…I will just have to entertain myself with a cacophony of painting, Andrea Gibson poetry, and pop music that blasts from next door, and try to get some more actual work done. Teaching of course is a struggle…It is the best of times… It is the worst of times. I’ve never encountered any activity really where I can be on the highest high at one moment, only to plummet into the depths of despair the next, then rapidly return to euphoria again later on. I have talked about this all before, and it always stays consistent in not being consistent! Next, I have GLOW Camp and a Negros crew excursion to Sipalay Sugar Beach for more scuba diving to look forward to, putting me at over 20 dives so far! Fantastic friends and fishes get me through the daily calamities! So do my funny, infuriating, intelligent, disrespectful, witty, loud, annoying, sweet, and obnoxious senior students. It’s the most rewarding but challenging experience ever... so I guess the Peace Corps slogan is accurate. “The toughest job you’ll ever love."